Humble Pie

Oh brothers and sisters. Let's be real mostly sisters, but I think my dad and my brother might read this. It is the wee morning hours. Why am I awake? It certainly couldn't be the fact that I took a full out 2 hour nap on Autumns couch this afternoon. The kind of dead to the world nap where you drool a little and have really odd dreams about the girl on the progressive commercials marrying your brother and then you have to spend Christmas and such with her. But whatever.

The last two weeks of life have been spent recouping after wrapping up my junior year of college. By recouping I mean doing nothing, laying on the couch, eating my feelings, watching too much food network, wearing a coat of denial about being a senior in college, and creeping on The Pioneer Woman's blog- and secretly wanting to be her best friend in a kind of "hey we're both gingers and we both like to cook! It's so meant to be" sort of way. It has been two weeks that I haven't known what to do with, given that I spent the entire past year of my life running around like a chicken with my head cut off. I almost forgot what Bobby Flay looks like. What tragedy. I have forgotten how to rest and have done too much on my own weak strength- at times I am a ninny. I love the word ninny. To my shock and utter terror, 2 weeks of doing nothing doesn't cure a year of pouring out like Niagra falls while drinking a spoonful of "Lord, will you help with this one thing? I've got the rest." Most of the time, I'm a BIG BIG ninny.

This is how I'm coming into orientation at camp. I'm exhausted. I'm humbled. I'm confused. I am so excited to jump back into that sweet community. I'm scared. I'm a little bit giddy. I'm ready to be back at a place where the Lord is the absolute focus and the joy that comes with it is unbearably rich and satisfying. I'm so thankful for the opportunity to be back. I'm weepy. I'm hungry. I'm loopy. I'm gingy. I trust and hope and pray that I'm right where the Lord wants me.

So here we are y'all. On the brink of summer 2011. I could not feel more excited or ill-prepared. Praise the Lamb that His truth is much bigger and better and honest than my feelings or my sense of being prepared.

"For it is God who is working in you, enabling you both to will and to act for His good purpose"

Philippians 2:13